Thursday, April 12, 2007

Race-Baiters and America; A Conversation

my head is actually THIS big as offensive as my hair

Oprah,Sharpton,Jackson: (taps American on the shoulder) Excuse me America...aren't you offended?

America: Um..what..?

Oprah,Sharpton,Jackson: We said, aren't you horribly offended by these awful racist and demeaning remarks!?

America: Um...not really. Why? Should we be?

Oprah, Sharpton, Jackson: Yes!! This is a travesty! A calamity! Profanity! Insanity! And like Maya Angelou said, "I wear scarves."

America: ???

Oprah, Sharpton, Jackson: Trust us folks. You should be offended.

America: Well....okay sure.

Oprah, Sharpton, Jackson: Good now...

America: But wait a minute. Oprah...didn't you just open a school in Africa that caters to only wealthy and prominant girls while the rest of the continent is dying and call it your "lifelong dream" and not allow the girls' families to attend commencement services but flew your friends Chris Tuker and Brad Pit in to see it all? And Al, didn't you call the Duke lacross players racists and rapists and say that the American justice system should be ashamed of itself if nothing less than life sentences are handed out to whom now appear to be completely innocent men who fell victim to a mentally ill African American woman? And Rev. Jackson didn't you once say "If the Jews want a fight, tell them to tie back their yarmulkes and come get some!"? This all seems just a bit strange to us, the easily swayed American public.

Oprah, Sharpton, Jackson: ....um....but we have JOHN TRAVOLTA!!!!!!!

America: Really!?? Sweet!!! Nevermind!

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

the power of equality...you never get it until you give it...

Anonymous said...

anonymous is jeremy...sorry...in case that is important

travis said...

Oprah, Sharpton, Jackson: "Me, me, me, me, me, me, me me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, you (I only said that to bring attention to me), me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me."

America: "We love you. We'll believe what you believe, buy what you buy, listen to what you listen to, read what you read. To whom else shall we go?, you have the words of life."

Oprah, Sharpton, Jackson: "Me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me..."

Travis: "Oprah, your show is taped in Chicago and Billy Corgan is a big pro-Chicagoan. Why have you never had him on your show? Gish rocks."

P_J said...

But, but ... RushOprahImusSharpton can't be wrong!

Blasphemer!