If The Boy Must Watch Cartoons...

If you've yet to discover the wonder of ATHF, that probably means you won't care for it.

But c'mon. It's 4 DA SHORTEE!!!

I'm Goin' To Jackson!!!!!

No Baby But A Great Record That Sounds Brilliantly Like Bruce Springsteen

Click the image to preview! Hooray Arcade Fire! Hooray Canada!

I fell for these guys last year when I heard so much David Bowie in their Funeral album. This year, this record, I hear a bit of the Boss coming through. And wowie, does it tickle my glad button. I guess incorporating elements from two of THE most important acts in rock history is a formula for success.

Most important rock acts...hmmm.

5. Bruce Springsteen

4. David Bowie

3. Bob Dylan

2. John Cash

1. Robert Johnson/Hank Williams Sr.

Going to Jackson

Your cries for a baby update have been heard.

I made it in this weekend and the boy graciously waited. We were thinking about doing the job sometime this week but really its up to whenever Moljr can meet me for beers.

Priorities still intact.

Man Up

Most of you know. We are having ourselves a baby. His name is Jackson. After the Johhny and June song.

They made cool tunes together. We made a cool baby together. It just made sense.

Well, Jackson is coming. And fast. Chels flew back to the states last week to have more regular visits with the midwife and read wacky books about how much childbirth doesn't hurt but is rather "exhilarating." This, of course, leaves me in the D.R. to celebrate Carnival with these guys:

(Not fun like my wife.)

That's right, at the tail end of our very first pregnancy, we thought it would be a great idea to put an ocean between us. I mean, what could go wrong?

So in the absence of my wife and not at all because I've run out of money, I've been doing my fair share of reading up on the whole birthing process. One book, the one with all the naked hippies, talks a great deal about the "role of the coach." I'll assume they mean me. "Listen", the book says, "you are not allowed to show any emotion towards your wife other than encouragement and loving support. No matter how terrified you are, no matter how deep the depths of your absolute confusion as to what is happening to this poor woman's body, and no matter what it smells like, you are not allowed to project anything other than absolute confidence in her and yourself. If you do not feel confident LIE! If you are tired, scared, clueless as to what in the hell is happening, don't show it! The consequences could be severe, including a misshapen or ugly baby or worse: you could be known all over the birth center as the guy who's laboring wife had to tell him 'you can do it honey!' Do not be this man!"

So, I decided to try it out when I called Chels the other night.

Chels: Hi honey! How are you.

Me: wimper, sniff..

Chels: Hello?

Me: wimper, weep, miss you, sob

Chels: Jess, it's OK. You'll be here before you know it!

Me: weeping, wimper, can't...make...it.

Chels: Sigh. I've gotta go.

A step in the right direction I think.

Yoga for Your Pregnancy

Yoga Pose #11: Beach Reach Pose

This pose can be accomplished by Taylor Sitting on the beach while reaching to retreive a **beverage** for your husband. Advanced practioners may want to try the double fisted reach. However, after 34 weeks you'll want to make sure and have a relaxed support nearby.

Yoga Pose #12: Prom Picture Pose. This pose can made more challenging for advanced yoga practioners by interlocking the fingers.

The Secret To Success: Sleep With Dudes!

It's been one of those weeks in the news that makes me grateful to not live in the States. But however hard I try, some madness always seems to creep through. My beloved Mark Cuban's interview concerning professionally gay athletes, um, gay professional athletes, has GOT to be the capper to seven days of diaper lined insanity:

"From a marketing perspective, if you're a player who happens to be gay and you want to be incredibly rich, then you should come out, because it would be the best thing that ever happened to you from a marketing and an endorsement perspective. You would be an absolute hero to more Americans than you can ever possibly be as an athlete, and that'll put money in your pocket."

Ah, the struggle for equality. Not to mention all the cash to be made fighting for it.

To Pepe, My New Broker

Yesterday (or so), my friend Pepe, after years of biting remarks and barbs of criticism, said this about NASA.

Today, the news said this about NASA.

You may now hang your head in shame Pepe. Shame.

Different Guy Same Mistake

Another reason to root exclusively for the Mavs upon my return to Texas.

For The Fam

Same (Um?) Guy

Welcome to the world Lily Grace!

I love her. I love her. I love her. My dear one Kaytie gave birth to this precious baby girl, Lily Grace Johnston, Monday early evening! I have fallen for her! I'm obsessed and giddy and proud. I can't stop staring at her picture!


Three cheers for kaytie and justin! You have blessed me, nay the world, with this lovliness!

The Sam To My Frodo The Click To My Clack

My wife is my hero.

This past weekend we were up to our old tricks. By that I mean cleaning the apartment. Chels was on laundry. I was hanging a mirror in our bathroom. I grabbed up the mirror with both hands and found this fellow hanging out on the rear side:

Let's call him vile demon-spider. He didn't seem to enjoy me moving the mirror much and with quickness obviously aided by his demon-spider special powers jumped from the mirror to my hand, up my arm and onto the sink.

Heroically, I fainted.

But just before he climbed atop my chest to suck the very soul from my helpless and unconscious being, Chels got him with a flip-flop. It looked kind of like this:

That's me there on the ground. And the sword should be a flip-flop.

After killing the vile demon-spider she told me to wrap its evil corpse in toilet paper and put it in the trash. I did, but only after she told me it was "okay" several times.

Boy she's great.

Brilliant?Humble?Egodriven?

Is it me or does U2 manage to pull off all three at once?

Thank You Gwen For The iTunes Gift Card Or Something Stevie And I Can Agree On

Yowza! Click on the pic to sample the goodness.

Twins.

I wish Thom Yorke would write a song about this guy!

(did someone say something about wearing Santa hats?)

When It Comes Down To It...

there's really two kind of people in the world: those who wear Santa Clause hats to work, and the rest of us.

Look, the rest of this post is going to be about Thom Yorke so if you want something else to do, here. (I imagine my target audience to be Trav and Hamster and Pepe and Seaner. Stevie read on if you like, but when you get bored, here.)


So, I've been locked in on York's solo record for going on three weeks straight. And I mean obsessively. Ask my wife and unborn child.


First things first. If you haven't yet, should you buy it? A great question with a fairly easy answer. It all depends on when you jumped off the Radiohead wagon. Look, Kid A and Amnesiac were purposefully polarizing records (more on that later) and if you thought they sounded more like Asteroids than the Radiohead you had come to know and love, you're going to want to stay way from the Eraser. But for many of us, A Thom Yorke vocal could be dropped over the sound of flatulence and we'd still find ourselves hypnotized and rapt with the beauty of it all. Shame on us. There's one, count them one, track on the Eraser that even hints at a band being anywhere in the building. And by "band" I mean Thom on very simple guitar, bass and kit tracks for a total of one looped measure. Everything else sounds like it came from a Powerbook. A British one. A fucking brilliant British one.



Do what you will with that review, but I'm moving on. As I've said, I've been a bit obsessive over York of late, like Kevin with reptiles. I've been consuming TY interviews and performances a dozen at a time for days. Weeks actually. As I've read, two impressive things continually return to the surface about this guy that are worth noting.


One. Yorke takes what he does VERY seriously. Read his interviews and there's not a hint of pretentiousness. What there is LOADS of though, is a sense of responsibility Yorke seems to place on himself. Over and over and over, he says things like "... as a person who is allowed to think a lot". Yorke has about as deep an understanding of his opportunity and responsibility as an artist than anyone since Bob Dylan. This was news to me. He says his content comes from one of two places: one, nightmares and two, an evaluation of what he sees going on around him and how that effects his environment. I knew about the nightmares. But how GREAT is it to hear an artist say, "look, I'm lucky enough to get to give good hard thought to the things around me and respond to them for a living. My plumber doesn't get to do that as much, nor get paid for it. So I want to take it seriously and be good at it. " Beats doing it for the Nookie.


Two. A repetitive lyrical theme for Yorke is the tension that exists between the systematic and the relational; the exaltation of efficiency over individuality and the doom that will come with it. Personally, I would go so far as to say its this message that lies at the core of Radiohead. Yorke often talks about Douglas Copeland in interviews and Radiohead's music and artwork reflect his ideas seamlessly; something innocent, paired with something ominous and or hopeless:



Alright. Thoughts?

Seaner and Pepe, get the whole record. Kevo and Trav start with Black Swan, Analyze, Atoms for Peace and the title track. Stevie, I hear John Mayer is touring. However, if you were going to appreciate anything on this record it might be Black Swan for the neato bass riff. C'mon, its 99 cents.

P.S. - Pepe this is for you. Stick with it for the whole 8 minutes and think systematic religion.

Nesting

This weekend I baked and decorated Christmas cookies...

and Jesse had many quality hours with Stella.














Jesse sympathy nested with me ALL WEEKEND... sharing in my pregnancy symptoms. I wonder if soon he too will have the heartburn and constipation?

World Peace Achieved For Approximately 30 Seconds

Anti-War Activists Plan 'Global Orgasm For Peace'.

A great idea really. Unless your single. Or have the clap.